I’ve had the pleasure of speaking to groups of coaches in the Washington DC Metro Area on the topic of, “Weaving Positive Psychology Tools into Your Coaching.” We began the session using the “What Went Well” tool that I shared with you in a previous article. I’d like to introduce you to a second tool that can help determine whether you languish, meaning barely holding onto life, or whether you thrive and flourish.
So it’s critical to build positive emotional experiences into our lives regularly. It’s not the intensity that matters most, it’s the frequency. So the Positivity Ratio is the “tipping point” that says if you experience positive emotions three times more frequently than negative emotions, you are much more likely to flourish and thrive.
3 positive emotional experiences for every 1 negative emotional experience = 3:1 ratio
If you experience positive emotions in a ratio of less than 3:1, you will be pulled into a downward spiral fueled by negativity and become rigid, burdened and lifeless. While the exact ratio has come under some debate as of late, the debate is not whether positive emotional experiences are important, but what is the exact ratio of positive to negative emotions needed for flourishing. Regardless of the debate, the evidence is overwhelming that experiencing positive emotions more frequently than negative one’s leads us to take off becoming alive with possibility and remarkably resilient to hard times. Our behavior is creative, alive and uplifted. In addition, pathways in our brains actually open up and light up when we experience positive emotions causing us to get better at seeing more possibilities.
If you’re looking for the benefits to positivity, of experiencing a positive mindset and positive emotions, they include:
- Being more sociable, charitable and cooperative and are better liked by others
- Showing more flexibility and creativity in your thinking and are more motivated, energetic and productive in your jobs
- Being leaders and negotiators and earn more money
- Being more resilient in the face of hardship, have more energy, stronger immune systems, and are physically healthier
- Have richer networks of friends and social support and even live longer
So what works to give you a quick boost of positivity?
“Even the smallest shots of positivity can give someone a serious competitive edge. Everyone has one or two quick activities they know will make them smile, and however trivial they may feel, their benefits are worth it.” – Shawn Achor, author of The Happiness Advantage